Lockdown, Badgers, and Travertine. 3 Poems by Niall Conroy


cocktail umbrellas
and pretzel fondu
jetskis and tvs and
golden kazoos
and half price on jigsaws and patio sets
lockdown is coming
so just dont forget

rubber shark toys
that you squeak in the bath
two years of toothpaste cause one week wont last

avocados and garlic
guacamole relief
crossbows and croissants and more self belief

now is the time to panic and run
black friday groundhog day rolled into one

buy if you need it
buy 3 if you dont
half price on llamas
and old mountain goats

lockdown is coming
so buy a canoe
rivers will flood through the places you knew

the spring has been cancelled so chop all the trees
army of butterfly nets for the bees
food will be scarce so lets shoot all the pets
coffins a dozen mahogany chests
better buy garlic for all the undead
and bullets of silver
to blast through the head

race week was really a walk in the park
compared to the frenzy that falls before dark
call in the navy the blue and the green
cancel the rainbows
and stop all the dreams
lockdown at midnight but dont
bring your friends
forward this message again and again
the mountains off limits the sea out of bounds
5 wind up robots for only a pound
better come now and you better come quick
wild rover to sing
before we get sick
so axes for doorways
and life preserve masks
cars will not do it
buy horses and carts
quiet man bridge
smashed up in lots
2000 euro for seventeen blocks
sell all the scenery
like cards from John Hinde
lockdown is coming
so open your mind.

together en masse like the french guillotines
well meet at the markets and kick and well scream
you touch me ill shoot you you kiss me ill die
im next at this checkout so dont even try

all of us staring like resevoir dogs
that woman has far too much quick starter logs

lockdown enforcers like cheap robocops
descend from the heavens and roads will be blocked
there was an old woman who lived down a well
shes not allowed out but so far she is well
that last line was dodgy
hemingway says
but he blew his brains out in personal hell
perhaps he was locked in his house for a year
his words all revolted and poured out his ears
they scrambled for meaning and
gathered in lines
i search for an ending
but card is declined
i bite on my pretzels
the end it is near
i must buy a footpump to blow up the deer.


holed up in our dens
cant see our friends
gone round the bend
or will we transcend?
badgers are brave
sleeping for days
torpor is the bomb
but days are so long
no mask use a thong
poem has gone wrong
badgers escaped
out garden gate
chased by white suits
with tests for the flu
house all sealed up
never give up
in the baskets of bikes
we fly through the night
in moonlight were free
just like in ET
the flower will rise
so break out the smiles
badgers in space
fur on your face.


we all learn from failure
brambles build our nests
hearts that feel so heavy
still fighting in our chest

no use in sugar coating
as some of us may fall
wash your hands of trouble
count your blessings one and all

emperors like Nero
built themselves a lake
but he fell foul of suicide back in 68
the one who came right after him drained the waters dry
built up walls of travertine
and windows to the sky

muse a fickle mistress
shes often in disguise
I think that shes abandoned
me and fears are running wild
I clamp my hands upon my ears another for me mouth
deep wounds cant be covered
we need to bleed them out.

a woman in a nursery rhyme
had nothing on her shelves
her dog he learned to jump next door and feast upon the elves
the shoemaker he got depressed and drank himself to death
tiny strips of leather
have not been mended yet

cancel all the parties and sell your finest clothes
old things in the attic can
be taken out and sold
things we take for granted
can be looked straight in the eye
on marble seats of travertine
not too close but side by side.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *